Back to School

 

Since we’ve been in the midst of a pandemic for a year and a half, it is difficult to remember how important feeling safe is to our mental health. But safety is vital, and if needs like safety aren’t met, a mental health condition may develop.

A lot of kids and teens haven’t been able to feel that sense of safety for a long time. Not only are they dealing with fears that a family member (or they themselves) might be exposed to COVID-19 or the Delta Variant, but some have had to face an abusive home environment, a family financial hardship, or a family loss recently. We know from research that an estimated 1.5 million children worldwide lost a mother, father, or other caregiving relative in the first 14 months of the pandemic.

When a kid or teen experiences this kind of hardship, it can feel as if the world is crashing down on them. That’s why it’s crucial right now, as students return to school, for parents, teachers, and administrators to do everything they can to foster a safe and secure environment. School can be a refuge from some of these difficult situations at home, and a place that students feel out of harm’s way.

Still, even in the safest of environments, we are in a youth mental health crisis, and many students will exhibit symptoms of depression and anxiety as they return to the classroom. It is important to let kids and teens know that support is available. The public and private elementary, middle, and high schools, as well as our nearby colleges and universities have different types of education and counseling services, your school’s counselor or social worker can be a great place to start.

Family Service of Glencoe is here to help. Our therapists are trained and experienced in working with children, teens, young adults, and their families. Contact us through our website at www.familyserviceofglencoe.org or call us at 847-835-5111 for consultation, resources, and/or counseling services.

There are also serious signs that someone is in crisis and needs more immediate help. These include thoughts or plans of hurting oneself or another person. If you think a child or teen is in immediate danger of taking suicidal action, call the national suicide hotline at 1-800-273-TALK. Their trained crisis counselors can help you find local resources or suggest next steps.

 

This article is adapted by Amber Bond, FSG Clinical Director, from Mental Health America’s annual Back to School Toolkit. MHA has mental health screening tools online. Students (and parents) can access www.MHAScreening.org for a free, confidential, and anonymous mental health screening.

Mental Health and Sport

Written by Amber Bond, NCC, LCPC, PMH-C

Mental health was a common topic of conversation at the 2020 Tokyo Summer Olympics. In gymnastics we saw men’s competitor Sam Mikulak speak openly prior to the games about the adverse effects of mental health stressors on performance. Women’s gymnast, Simone Biles withdrew from events when her mental health made it unsafe for her to compete. Former Olympian, Michael Phelps, shared details of his road to recovery after substance abuse and mental health struggles. Tennis great, Naomi Osaka made headlines prior to the Olympics for withdrawing from play due to the stress caused by mandatory interviews with the media. Read more

Friendship

Friendship is crucial to our mental wellbeing, no matter our age. These connections enrich our lives with mutual support and enjoyment. We need these relationships to help us manage the stressors of everyday (and not so everyday) life. But what do we do if our friend is what we are stressed about? 

The answers are surprisingly similar, regardless of our age: 

  1. Open the door 
    Let your friend know you are worried about them. Try to do this in a non-judgmental way. Remember your goal is to get them to talk to you, not to make them feel bad for letting you down as a friend. Some ideas to think about, “I’m worried about you. I’ve noticed X and Y has happened recently and I wanted to let you know that I’m here for you” or “I get worried when I hear you say “X and Y. Can we talk about it?
  2. Just listen
    Easier said than done.  When someone we care about is upset, it’s natural to want to spring into action to make things better. Try to curb that impulse by just listening and offering emotional support. Often, that’s exactly what our friends need to feel better, just to know someone cares enough to listen.
  3. Pay attention to your gut
    You may not be a mental health professional, but you probably know your friend better than a lot of people. If your friend’s challenges seem like more than you can hold alone or if you are feeling worried about your friend’s safety, bring in more support. Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or text The National Crisis Text Line at 741741.
  4. Encourage your friend to get help
    There are many screening tools from Mental Health America at https://screening.mhanational.org/screening-tools/. Your friend can reach out to FSG for counseling or referrals.
  5. Make sure you have support
    It is so easy, and normal, to feel stressed when a friend is struggling. Talk to someone you trust: a parent, coach, your sibling, and or your own therapist. Try not to talk to mutual friends or acquaintances unless they also know what your friend is going through.  

It may be difficult to bring these things up with a friend. Doing so shows that friend how much you care. When they’re feeling better, your friendship may be stronger because you took the time and energy to look out for them.  

Standing with Naomi Osaka

In recent days, Japanese Professional Tennis Player Naomi Osaka has been in the news.  Normally, the news is about her competitive tennis playing, the fact that she has been ranked #1 according to the Women’s Tennis Association and is the first Asian player to hold the top ranking in singles. She is a four-time Grand Slam singles champion and is the reigning champion at the US Open and the Australian Open.

But the story has not been about her incredible skill as a world champion tennis player. Naomi, like many professional athletes, suffers from mental illness.   She revealed that she has experienced depression and anxiety since winning her first major at the 2018 US Open and explained that speaking to the media often triggers episodes of anxiety.  According to a tweet made by Naomi, “anyone who has seen me at tournaments will notice that I’m often wearing headphones as they dull my social anxiety.” Because of this condition, Naomi has chosen to take care of herself by withdrawing from the French Open.


Family Service of Glencoe stands with Naomi, and all those suffering from any form of mental illness.  Naomi’s courage to speak out in advocating for herself and others is another step forward in the fight to eliminate stigma associated with this disease.  Naomi is among several elite athletes such as Michael Phelps and Kevin Love, who have been open about their struggles with mental illness and hoping more athletes will do the same.  

The need for mental health services is stronger than ever and FSG is here to help.

Alcohol Awareness Month – April 2021

As we pass through the vernal equinox and welcome Spring, we also recognize Alcohol Awareness Month. With the renewed energy and hope that comes with Spring, it is an opportunity to reflect on our relationship with alcohol. I call it a relationship because the ways in which we discuss and use alcohol does have the potential to impact our lives and the lives of our loved ones.  This introspection is appropriate for both adults and children and is especially pertinent for teenagers who are regularly confronted with difficult choices around their peers. The National Institute of Health’s Monitoring the Future Survey found 55.3% of high school seniors had consumed alcohol in the past year. So, how do we begin these conversations?

It is important to recognize first and foremost that alcohol is not inherently “bad.” In fact, we have seen literature suggesting that the polyphenols in red wine may help protect the lining of blood vessels in our hearts, but only when consumed in moderation. We might wonder then, what can we do as individuals and parents to help increase awareness around the impact of alcohol use on the developing mind? There is an abundance of literature that discusses the negative impact alcohol use has on the developing mind. As caregivers, there is much that we can do to support our youth in making healthy choices. Ultimately, it starts with making healthy choices for ourselves, as our children look to us as models for how to navigate the world.

It is important to consider how we speak about alcohol in the house and what messages we send to our children – are parents drinking every day after work? The all too often stated “What a day! I need a drink!” can carry heavy weight when spoken in front of a child or teenager, who undoubtedly looks up to their caregivers and may emulate them. Careful introspection of our own behavior, verbal and actions delivers a strong message to our impressionable children. While our children may “rebel” overtly by insinuating that our behavior toward alcohol is either too restrictive or too liberal, our conduct makes an indelible impression that often serves a guide to how our children develop their own relationship with alcohol. The trite advice of “moderation” may not be trite at all but a good model for all.

Random Acts of Kindness (RAK) week

Join the Glencoe Kindness Challenge!

Family Service of Glencoe is teaming up with District 35 to celebrate Random Acts of Kindness Week from February 14-20. Learn more about the science of kindness and ways to engage here.

By doing one small act of kindness every day, you will spread kindness and help make it the norm! We encourage all Glencoe families to find a safe way to participate this year.

Take the challenge!

Sunday, February 14
Write a letter to a family member, friend, or coworker you care about.

Monday, February 15
Put together a care package for an individual in need.

Tuesday, February 16
Text someone good morning or good night.

Wednesday, February 17 —
Random Acts of Kindness Day
Thank at least one person. You can write a letter, make a phone call, or send a text expressing your gratitude.

Thursday, February 18
Find out something new about a friend, coworker, or family member.

Friday, February 19
Donate books, clothes, or toys you no longer need.

Saturday, February 20
Leave a positive comment on a website, blog post, or social media post.

Snap a photo of you performing your Random Act of Kindness each day and share it on social media to encourage your friends and family to join in on the challenge. Make sure to tag us @FamilyServiceOfGlencoe so we can like and share your post.

 

Did you know that 76% of clinicians are doing teletherapy? Did you know that Family Service of Glencoe offers teletherapy?

What does this mean exactly? It means that if you have a phone or computer you can meet with a therapist for a therapy session. It means that you can schedule the session at your convenience. It means that if you’re in- network with BCBS PPO of Illinois or Medicare, your sessions are covered.

More importantly, it means that if you’re feeling anxious, depressed, out of sorts, frustrated or isolated, FSG is here to help.

Does teletherapy really work? The answer is yes. While most therapists and clients prefer in-person sessions, Covid-19 has forced us to rethink telehealth. Clients and therapists report feeling a connection that was once thought to have occurred only through in-person sessions.

FSG currently offers therapy sessions through a HIPPA -approved video platform. Client feedback is overwhelmingly positive because telehealth is incredibly flexible. Senior clients report liking the fact that they don’t have to find a parking space. Teens like that they can close their bedroom door and meet with a therapist in private. Parents can meet either during the day, or after the kids have gone to bed.
If you’ve been wondering whether now is the right time to explore therapy for yourself or a family member, give us a call.

Cal 847/835-5111 OR kathy@familyserviceofglencoe.org

Coping with the Covid-19 Quarantine: Tips for Healthy Living

by Kathy Livingston, LCSW, Clinical Director

Imagine someone had sat you down on January 1, 2020 and told you the following:

Beginning mid-March, your children will not go to school. They will be home-schooled using remote learning. Your college-aged children will be sent home and will finish the year by remote learning. If you work, you will either work from home, or, you may be laid off or furloughed. You won’t be able to see your loved ones or friends in person without maintaining a 6-foot separation. Even then, you may not be able to spend time with your elderly relatives. You will wear masks when going outside in public spaces.

Sounds like a fantasy, right? But the reality is our world has turned upside down and inside out. Today, three months in to the Covid-19 quarantine, our predictable, reliable way of life no longer exists. Instead, we have adapted to a new way of living. Within our homes we’ve adjusted to remote learning and working from home. We venture outside when the weather cooperates, taking advantage of fresh air while maintaining social distance. High school graduations, college graduations, trips and summer programs are either postponed or canceled.  The typical transitions of daily life can’t happen so how do we cope? How do we begin to embrace and thrive in this new world rather than just tolerate and accommodate?

Experts who’ve weighed in recommend routine and structure as two key factors in adaptation. By developing and practicing habits, we learn to readjust more easily. By now, you may have figured out that spending all day in your pajamas probably isn’t a good idea. Waking up at a normal hour, dressing in clothing rather than sweats or pajamas and sticking to regular mealtimes can help us acclimate to this new way of life.

Creating purpose and intent in your life is also key, as many experts have pointed out. After adapting to our new way of life, how do we live with more intention rather than just gritting our teeth and tolerating this experience? Becoming resilient in times of stress means finding meaning, practicing gratitude and reaching out for help when you need it. Intention can simply mean making a nice meal for your family, reading a book you’ve been wanting to read, practicing meditation or making exercise a part of your daily routine.

What are you grateful for? Are there silver linings in staying home? These might be spending more quality, uninterrupted time with your family, working on a puzzle together, creating a Zoom family reunion or simply giving thanks for having food on the table, a roof over your head and a job to go back to. New Trier Township families have cooked and delivered meals to hospital staffs, cooked for the homeless, helped to fill the New Trier Township Food Pantry and checked in on elderly neighbors to make sure they’re safe and have food. Getting involved provides a sense of purpose and control in our daily lives.

Finally, how do you tend to your mental and emotional health? Knowing when to reach out for help is key. Are you feeling depressed and anxious most of the day? It’s normal to feel some sad feelings and grieve for canceled trips, graduations and parties. It’s normal to be concerned about your health and the health of your loved ones. But if your sadness or anxiety prevents you from participating in daily life, it’s time to reach out. Talking with a therapist can help you or your family members cope with stress. If you’re a parent, therapy can help you feel more resilient in dealing with your children. Taking care of your mental health is just as important as your physical health. Family Service of Glencoe is here to help you.

Resources

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/daily-life-coping/managing-stress-anxiety.html

Caring from afar: Strategies for supporting older adults during COVID 19

By Emily Mysel LCSW FSG Senior Program Manager

For many older adults during this pandemic, their ability to connect with the outside world has been limited. Over the past two months, older adults, who are residing in independent and assisted living communities and skilled nursing facilities, have had limited social interactions. They have only been able to have direct contact with staff, home health care aides, and other employees in order to protect the safety and well-being of their communities. These safety restrictions have been very difficult for families as they miss their loved ones and find it difficult to help from afar.
Here are some ways to reach out to your loved ones residing in communities:
Write letters and encourage your friends and family to write letters:
Share something on your social media account like “My mom/dad has been in quarantine since March and hasn’t stepped out of her/his apartment. If you have a few minutes and would consider sending a card or note with good wishes it may help to fill all those lonely hours.”

Speak to a staff member (i.e. activities coordinator, social worker) about helping your loved one Facetime or Zoom and discuss ways to incorporate it into their weekly schedule.
For many communities, staff are helping to set up and guide the older adult during the call or are teaching the older adult so he/she can learn to do it independently.

Send care packages of things your loved ones enjoy:
Activities: Sudoku, crossword puzzles, ad libs, word searches, adult coloring books
Food/Treats: hard candy, chocolate, pretzels, cookies
Reminiscing Activities: creating picture albums, music (cds)
Personal Hygiene and Essentials: lotion, hand sanitizer, soap, disinfectant wipes, towel papers, paper towels

Establish and coordinate weekly calls
There are volunteers and agencies that have established weekly calls to seniors. Argentium Senior Connections in Evanston is a weekly friendly call program. For more information contact: Mary Ellen Viskocil, Program Manager, at 847-869-0682.
Rotate between family members and assign them a day to call and check in with your loved one.

Visit outside:
Sit outside your loved one’s window (even if it’s just for 5 minutes).
Put signs outside the window so they have words of encouragement or pictures to look at.

Unfortunately, for some older adults living in communities, they are not able to participate in these activities and that’s why it’s even more essential to check in with the staff and get updates. Collaborate and find ways that you can provide the opportunity be part of your loved one’s life from a distance.

If you have a loved one who resides in a community or an older adult who lives at home and need recommendations and/or support, please contact Emily Mysel, LCSW, Senior Program Manager at 847-835-5111

Emily’s sons visiting their great-grandparents at their independent living community in Wilmette.
Emily’s sons visiting their great-grandparents at their independent living community in Wilmette.

Friendly Visitors Needed!